Friday, June 22, 2012

God had my back...and gave me a friendly shove...

So yesterday was one of those blah days. It started out with little sleep, a pounding sinus headache, and just an overall weak feeling. I didn't really care too much about what I ate(I had a donut...gasp), and a few other things that were not so great. I already had an excuse to not go running, as Dad was supposed to be taking Mom out for her birthday. Until Mom called and said he was sick so she would be free after her meeting. CRAP. There went that excuse...sooo I just came back with "I'm not feeling well...we'll see how I am this afternoon." (I really didn't feel very well until about 4... when the headache seemed to lift.) She called me at 5:50 and said she would be ready in 15 minutes. Alright then. Shelby was already feeding Lenae supper and there I stood with zero excuses left. SUCK.IT.UP. Surprisingly when I pulled up to the track almost instantly I felt energized, and was even optimistic about the run. I thought to myself..."Won't it feel great when I can finally pass that 1 Mile hump that seems so daunting? That will be the day!!" We start out with the 5 minute warm up walk, and do the first 2 laps of jogging(which always seem to be the hardest because my legs have to adjust to running, not walking.) They were ok, wasn't really overcome with tiredness or the worn out feeling like normal. So onto the next set of running(only supposed to be 3 laps), halfway through lap 1 I kept having this overly optimistic thought..."Okay Joelle, I wonder if you could actually do this? It's just a did it all the time in high school" Then came lap 2...still wasn't tired, actually I was the complete opposite. "Hmm...I really bet I could. Wouldn't that feel great?" Then the realist in me said "Uh just wait til you get to lap 3 and then see how you feel missy!" Now mind you, all of this is bouncing around inside of my head...far from where anyone else can hear it and actually hold me to it...and I hear Mom say "Put it in your mind...we'll get to the end of Lap 3 and just see how far we can go after..." The optimist said "UM...DING DING DING" So we get to the end of lap 3 and we are not the previous few times we had felt. We kept going and man it felt great. We finished lap 4. 1 MILE. I seriously just ran a flipping mile. That thought I had when I was getting out of my car on how wonderful it would eventually feel...yeah well, that was that day! We probably could have actually gone more, but we still had another set of 2 laps to do. (Which we did by the way) So all in all we walked 1 mile, jogged 2 segments of .5 miles(which totals to a mile), and jogged a straight mile. That's 3 miles. Wow.

I really firmly believe that God knew I needed last night to happen. To push me over a day that had started out so rough, and had me feeling so down on myself. It was a major pick me up. It's funny how just 1 off day can potentially ruin an entire month's worth of work on becoming healthy. Before the run, I was almost ready to toss everything out I had been working on and just pig out on ice cream and bread and french fries. And then after the run I went to the grocery store, bypassed the ice cream section and grabbed a pack of Jello Cheesecake snacks (only 130 calories) for my sweet tooth. Okay I know they still aren't the healthiest thing...but it saves me from that 500 calorie bowl of ice cream with hot fudge! After putting the groceries into my car, I looked for the cart rack to take mine to, and actually opted for the one that was further away. This coming from the girl that usually based where she parked on being close to the rack.

You know what else I have noticed in the past 2 weeks? My ankles and feet don't feel like they are breaking everytime I get up from the couch or out of bed in the morning. I used to cloud my head with the excuse that it was because I was getting older. (Seriously Joelle?!? You're 25...your ankles and feets have absolutely no excuse to feel that way. STOP)  It used to take me a few Zombie like steps to loosen them up...but there's no more zombieness to it at all. I can feel the weight lifting...

Today I also decided that I am going to start making a game out of drinking my alottment of daily water. In order to have my beloved Diet Coke, I have to first drink 1- 33 oz bottle of water in the morning. No water, no Coke. And before I have my 2nd Diet Coke(usually with supper) I have to drink 2 more of those bottles. I try to get in anywhere from 80 to 100 oz of water in a day...any less and I feel like a big bloated ball. So far today I've had 1 Diet Coke, and have 1 1/4 bottles left for my 2nd. I better get to gulping!!

Guess what I am going to brave and where I am going again tomorrow????
But...probably closer to closing time and still the shorts and tank steps. SOMEDAY...SOMEDAY Pin It

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

“The first wealth is health”- Emerson

How True is that? There are very few things in life that aren't directly connected to our health. The most obvious, yet sometimes the most challenging is the ability to be able to actually "Live your Life" Seems simple right? Well as I sit here and look back over MANY instances where I decided to pass up doing something because of how I felt or how I felt I would look to others, I am deeply saddened by how much I have missed out on. For example, the new swimming pool to many others presented a fun new activity for families to enjoy. For me, it presented a MAJOR challenge. How could I continue to make the excuse that it's boring to go to the pool because there's nothing to do there, when quite obviously this is no longer true. Not only was I keeping myself from enjoying something new and fun, I was holding Lenae back from an experience that every child deserves to have. Sure she went once with my sister and had a blast, but I was also missing out on that experience of watching her laugh and giggle down the slide or attempt to go under water. I finally decided, even though I kept on a pair of short athletic shorts and a tank top on, that I would brave it and take her. And I'm glad that I did. Even though I will feel much better when I am confident enough to just wear a suit, I still had fun with her.

My whole point is that I want to get healthy enough to where I'm not having to constantly tug at my shorts, readjust my tight tanktop underneath my shirt, or wonder what the other person is thinking of me. I want to just be able to be present in the moment and enjoy the people I am with. So to that, on with the workouts!

Our walk/jog(or plod as Mom calls it) have taken place in many different locations. We started down at the park, moved on to my neighborhood blocks, out to the country, and just recently the BHS Track. I can honestly say that the track is by far my favorite location, only because I can SEE exactly how much further I have to go each time. I can say in my head "Okay Joelle, push it 200 more meters. You've got this" I've always been a visual and do it myself learner. I have to be able to see things done or do it myself to be able to conquer it. Throughout the various locations we have gone from starting out  jogging for 60 sec and walking for 90. I thought I was going to DIE! Fast forward to last night where the workout was "Walk 5 min, jog 2 laps, walk 1 lap, jog 3 laps, walk 1 lap, and jog 2 laps." We have gotten our half mile time down to about 6 minutes. Give or take 20 seconds :) That's coming a LONG way from almost passing out at the thought of doing 60 seconds.

I am starting to actually see the results of these workouts from being able to fit into old tshirts that were once way too tight, taking off 2.5 inches off of each measurement, and down 10 lbs from where we started. It has actually, without much intentional effort, changed my diet and eating habits. I went from drinking anywhere from 5 to 6 Diet Cokes a day. Now, I really only have 2. Anymore than that and I seem to get headaches, but any less than that and I get headaches too(it's that caffiene addiction!) I have also found myself snacking a lot less...almost not at all! I have gone from drinking virtually no water to about 6 to 7 20 oz bottles a day, and CRAVE protein non stop. I can't get enough of it whether it be chicken, eggs, almonds, steak, and the once every so often Nature Valley Peanut butter granola bar. I've been way more aware of portion control and stopping at when my stomach is full...not when my plate is empty. And all of this without even trying. I think running has rewired my brain to Healthy Mode, not Lazy Mode anymore. I am welcoming it with open arms!!!!

In closing, “It takes 4 weeks for you to notice your body changing, 8 weeks for your friends to notice, and 12 weeks for the rest of the world to notice. Give it 12 weeks. Don’t QUIT!” We are on Week 6...give or take a week. I've already seen the up.... Pin It

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Accountability is my biggest obstacle

So I'm giving this a try in hopes to further motivate myself in my goal for a happier, healthier life. I need to be held accountable to continue things that I have started, or I will talk myself out of them rather easily. So...hold me accountable!!

A little from the past before the now...I have struggled with weight since that awkward age of 12. Not skinny enough, always feeling on the bigger end of the size scale. There were so many different points of weight loss and weight gain, that it's hard to look back at pictures and remember which point that was. I know that my last cycle of weight loss was my summer right before college. I wanted to go into it looking good, I was single and even impress myself still when I look at pictures. I was able to maintain that until the next summer when I nabbed myself a guy(who is now my husband). I got comfortable, didn't feel the need to impress anyone, and spent more time in front of the tv than the eliptical at the Rec. So about 50 lbs later I woke up and looked at the mirror. I felt bad, but never really bad enough to stop. So it just continued.

Fast forward 3 yrs to the summer of 2010 where I find out I'm pregnant. I was in no shape whatsoever to be healthy enough to have an uneventful pregnancy. I knew in the back of my mind..."okay, this is going to be one hell of a double edged sword. it will be the most magical, but yet could potentially be the scariest event of your life" I pushed that thought to the back of my mind for 4 more months and would occasinally go on a walk here and there to ease that creeping negativity for a week or so. Then bam "Joelle, your blood pressure is a little high". I would continue to hear this for 2 more months. Until there were headaches, chest pains, and diabetes added to the table. Multiple rounds of shots of insulin and blood thinners took over my days, as well as checking sugars, and walking so many circles around the house to bring my numbers down. And then came the hospital stays and steroid shots. Finally at 36 weeks, 1 wk before my scheduled induction and while I was still on blood thinners, I went into labor on my own. After 24 hours of labor without anything other than Nubain(which did nothing for me), through C-Section my little miracle was born, completely unscathed. My diabetes was gone within a matter of hours, and my blood pressure leveled out. Phew! I was soo ready to get back at exercising and losing this whole other me that I had gained in so many years.

I did really well for a few months, and then fell away from it again. Tried Shakes, tried walking, etc. Nothing kept me interested and accountable. So I gave up. And then again, my blood pressure started creeping up. So now it was time for full blown BP Meds. Ugh. After several switches, and one scary hosptial stay, my mom and I decided we were going to train for a 5k. I've had enough. I've had enough headaches, I've had enough days of not being able to wear those pants or that shirt. I've had enough of the breathless feeling I get from walking up a flight of stairs. I mean really? When did this happen? I have made it my mission to keep at this, to get healthy for not only myself, but for my daughter. This is no longer about me. I am responsible for another human being. How is eating myself into the ground being responsible? If we ever decide to have another will NOT be on the same terms of the last one. I WILL be healthy the next time. I will NOT ever make myself go through checking sugars, insulin shots, and headaches again. If I can voluntarily keep Diabetes away, I will do it with all of my heart. And lastly, I will NOT willingly succomb to the Heart and Blood Pressure issues that plague my family blood lines. I don't want my daughter to have to deal with this someday, so why let myself? Why not be the example?

We have done really well at keeping each other accountable, at going even though one of us didn't feel like it. When I complain and say, I can't make it this last 200 yards, mom is always right there saying "Uh yes you can. just tell yourself you can" After a few bumps and a bout of Plantar's Fasciitis, we are on Week 5. That's 5 weeks worth of a running program than I had ever thought possible 2 months ago!

So tonight, we run Wk 5, night 2 of the Couch to 5K. One more night closer to my goal. Pin It